April 2022: Greenlights + Build Back Better (Habits)

April 2022: Greenlights + Build Back Better (Habits)

Here’s hoping your Monday went well and that your May is off to a great start! April 2022 was far too cold, but I still shivered my way through a full month to recap for you: 

Best Book I Read This Month 

I read my first celebrity memoir, and I think it’ll probably be my last celebrity memoir. Matthew McCounaughey’s Greenlights was a wild ride. Beautiful quotes and wise advice were interspersed with stories so crazy they must be true (partially because a good number of them reflected very poorly on him, his family, and other loved ones). It was an entertaining and bewildering read, and you can get the book here. 

Best Article I Read This Month

I swear I read journalism from other outlets and not just from the magazine I work for, but Reason has so many good takes it would be a crime to not share. Enjoy this longform read from our May 2022 issue talking about the pandemic, social networks, and old-time saloons. 

Tip + Trick of the Month

Do you want to cut back on mindless social media scrolling? Set time limits on your phone, but let someone you live with set the password. And DO NOT let them tell you what it is. I share a house with my sister, and since having her set my phone’s time limits, I am far more exacting in my social media use. I’m not exaggerating when I say it has reduced my phone use by hours every week. 

Quote of the Month

“If you are part of Christ’s own body, your sins evoke his deepest heart, his compassion and pity. He ‘takes part with you’—that is, he’s on your side. He sides with you against your sin, not against you because of your sin. He hates sin. But he loves you.” 

-Dane Ortlund, Gentle and Lowly

Kelvey’s Thought for the Month

I was in great shape when I was in college, but by the time 2021 rolled around, I couldn’t say the same. Between gym closures, reduced outings, and food delivery, the pandemic took the same toll on me that it did on everyone else. Couple that with a newly diagnosed thyroid disorder, and I lost a lot of muscle mass while putting on inches and generally losing a lot of my former healthy habits. 

2022 has been my rebuilding year, and I’ve rebuilt with wellness (not just muscles or hard workouts) in mind. Here are some of the simple habits that have had me feeling better, building more muscle, and leading a healthier life than I have in years. Steal if they work for you! 

  • Prioritizing Enough Quality Sleep
  • Getting 150 Grams of Daily Protein
  • Maintaining Average Calorie and Macro Consumption
  • Averaging 70,000 Weekly Steps
  • Building An Adjustable Workout Schedule

That’s all for now, folks. Have a great May – I’ll catch you next month.

Your monthly recap from kelveyolivia.com is here.

March 2022: The Club + Shark Attack Documentaries

Happy Monday! I wanted to steer very clear of April Fools Day, so here’s a delayed monthly recap for your morning. 

Best Book I Read This Month 

The Club was one of those books I checked out on a whim but found myself recommending immediately after finishing. Plot twist after effortless plot twist. It has been a long time since I turned the final few pages of a book with truly no idea how it was going to end. Highly recommend it if you are needing a good piece of fiction. (Fair warning though, this is not for the kids.) 

Best Article I Read This Month

When picking my favorite article from each month, I automatically go look at the ones I have shared on Facebook – it’s a pretty good barometer for what I find interesting enough to share. There were so many good ones this month, but I think the most important story I could share is this profile on a high-risk pregnancy in prison. Devastating. The handling of prison pregnancies is a place where pro-lifers and criminal justice reformers (both of which I consider myself to be) should be teaming up to enact change. 

Tip + Trick of the Month

This comes from James Clear of Atomic Habits notoriety: 

“Nearly everything in life has a useful zone, a desired dose. Ten minutes in the sun can energize you. Ten hours in the sun can burn you. This concept applies to many things: work, relationships, hobbies, exercise, food. What is your desired dose? What do you need right now? A little bit more or a little bit less? 

Quote of the Month

“Libertarianism is the ‘diet and exercise’ of politics. No one wants to hear it. Implementing it will be painful sometimes. But it’s the only way to make our society healthy. There simply is no other option.” 

While the original quote is from @checkmatestate on Twitter, the addendum from Reason’s Nick Gillespie is worth considering. 

Kelvey’s Thought for the Month

I watch a lot of shark attack documentaries. It’s actually an absurd amount. As a result, I end up thinking about shark attacks potentially more than the average person, especially when I know I am visiting the ocean. (Imagine my relief when I discovered that my last seaside vacation spot had not had a documented shark attack over the last six decades.) 

I consume a lot of shark attack documentaries, so I think about shark attacks more. If you consume a lot of angry political Twitter or fearful news, what is going to slowly take over your thinking? We become what we consume, so consume well. 

Enjoy your April! I’ll see you next month.

February 2022: At Your Best + Lent Around The Corner

February 2022: At Your Best + Lent Around The Corner

Is anyone else extremely happy about the warmer weather? Dreary winter days, be gone! As we close out the month, here’s your February update talking about books, burnout, and more. 

Best Book I Read This Month 

February was a month where I started a lot of books…that I have yet to finish. Hah. Does anyone else relate? But there’s a book I only have a few more pages left of that has been extremely life-giving. 

At Your Best by Carey Nieuwhof speaks to me on so many levels. I hit a point of burnout back in December. While I have removed the chief source of that burnout, I’m still working to shape a schedule and routine that will help prevent me from burning out in the future. This book teaches you how to shape a schedule that leverages your energy cycles to actually work on your priorities. Highly recommend it – you can read more about the book here

Best Article I Read This Month

Amir Locke’s murder was horrifying. And, all gun owners (such as myself) should be condemning the fact that police murdered a man because they caught a glimpse of his lawfully owned weapon. While this National Review article was much more sympathetic to law enforcement than I am, it makes great points about the fact that gun ownership is multiracial in this country. 

Tip + Trick of the Month

Again referring to At Your Best, you should be doing your most important work when you’re at your best. I think we can all read that and have a ‘duh’ moment. But this can be easily boiled down to two things: working according to your energy levels and blocking distractions. For the first, pay attention to when you’re the most awake, efficient, and ‘on’ (for me, it’s usually before 10 am). As for the second…well…good luck. 

Quote of the Month

This quote is attributed by many to John Wesley. On how to live your life…

“Set yourself on fire with passion, and people will come from miles to watch you burn.” 

Kelvey’s Thought for the Month

Lent is right around the corner. As we enter into this season on Wednesday, many of you who are believers that, like me, do not belong to Catholic or Lutheran traditions may be questioning whether this season is something you should observe. I believe you should.

Observation of the church calendar is one of the easiest ways to orient yourself toward Christ throughout the year. Lent marks a season of renewal, of removing the things that take our gaze from Jesus. So dig in. Identify what, if removed, would draw you nearer to Christ. Remove distractions and turn toward the cross over these 40 days. You will not regret it. 

Enjoy your March! I’ll see you next month.

Welcome to the January 2022 recap - read on about Atomic Habits, my new job, and more. 

January 2022: Atomic Habits + A New Job

Happy it’s-not-January, everyone! Why is it that we always set out to completely change our lives in one of the most dreary months possible? You made it. It can only get better from here. Welcome to the January 2022 recap – read on about Atomic Habits, my new job, and more. 

Best Book I Read This Month 

I’m clocking in at four books read this month. It might have been more, but COVID-19 knocked me out for nearly a week. If you had it, did it impact your reading comprehension? I’m just grateful to be able to pick up a book and understand it again without lines blurring together. 

My favorite book from January is Atomic Habits by James Clear. This is a best seller for a reason and was actually a reread for me. A very practical read, this book helps so much with understanding how to build the habits and rhythms that make up our days. Read more about it here

Best Article I Read This Month

We are constantly throwing tech terms around, and some of us might not know what Meta is, let alone the metaverse. Mashable put together this handy guide to some of the most popular tech terms flying around lately. NFTs? Blockchain? Read all about it here

Tip + Trick of the Month

I’m 90 percent sure I originally discovered the following in Jon Acuff’s Finish, but it’s something I’ve been ruminating on as we start off the year. When we set goals, we often set them ambitiously rather than practically. Yes – ambition and pushing yourself are important. But nothing sucks motivation from something faster than it being unattainable or unsustainable. This year, take your end goal and cut it. 

Aiming to read 52 books when you didn’t read one last year? Read 25. Want to run a marathon this year when you can barely run a mile? Start with a 5K or a 10K. Set the bar where it’s still a goal, but within reach – you’ll be a lot more motivated to go for the next milestone. 

Quote of the Month

I’m hoping this will usually be a little bit deeper, something to think about…but I loved the following tweet and think it wins quote of the month: 

Kelvey’s Thought for the Month

There’s been a life change! While I’m thankful for all I learned working in consulting, I left my position as a communications manager for a local public relations firm in the middle of January. New title? Communications specialist for Reason Foundation and Reason Magazine. Nothing like getting to work with fellow libertarians all day on great policy and the journalism that brings good ideas to life. It is GOOD to be once again gainfully employed within the liberty movement. 

Enjoy your February! I’ll see you next month.

Kelvey Olivia Dot Com blog announcement

What Kelvey Olivia Dot Com Will Look Like In 2022…

The Kelvey Olivia Dot Com blog used to be the section of my personal website that caught literally all my random ramblings. And, there used to be a weekly cadence of posting. I have been pretty quiet over the last months as I thought about what I wanted the future of this website to look like. Now, as we draw this year to a close, I am excited to share what is in store. 

This blog is not going anywhere, rest assured. But my life has changed a lot and I want the website to reflect it. For 2022, I will be transitioning over to a monthly cadence and will be using each monthly post to share in a more structured way. These posts will highlight the following: 

Best Book I Read This Month 

I read a LOT. I love talking about books, and I love hearing book recommendations. So, I will be highlighting my favorite read of the month and would love to have you let me know in the comments whether you have read it and/or what other books you recommend. 

Best Article I Read This Month

I work full-time as a writer and communicator. That means I don’t just read a lot of books – I read a LOT of digital articles. Whether news or opinion, short-form or long-form, lifestyle or theological, I’ll loop you in on my favorite pick of the month. To get you started, enjoy this fun read about camel botox I stumbled upon a few weeks ago by clicking here

Tip + Trick of the Month

I like to share what works for me. But I also like sharing great ideas FROM other people WITH other people. Catch me sharing the tips and tricks I stumble across here. 

Quote of the Month

This is pretty self-explanatory. I’m the person who completely uses up highlighters when reading, so I’m particularly excited about this section. 

Kelvey’s Thought for the Month

Finally, I still want to include space to write about what has been on my mind. This might be a new workout routine, Scripture, a lifestyle change, or something else. I’m leaving this vague on purpose, and look forward to sharing my perspective in a fitting way each month. 

I hope you join me in 2022. Happy new year!

25 things in 25 years

25 Things in 25 Years

Usually, commemorating another year on the planet would fall within a couple of days of the day itself. However, when I turned 25 on September 13th, I was in Iceland with no access to a laptop. And it was GLORIOUS. (See the end for a couple photos.) 

Spending 10 days abroad with no laptop, no pressure to write and think was really nice. But I firmly believe that touchpoints like birthdays, the beginning of a new year (season…month…week…day), and the like are amazing opportunities to stop and remember. And 25 years was a substantial enough point that I felt the need to really sit with the years, think through them, and assess where I’ve come from and what God has done. 

So, nearly a month after the fact, here are 25 things I’ve learned from the last 25 years that I feel like you should know: 

  1. You will become a different person through different stages of life. It’s okay. Sometimes letting an old self die will feel like a funeral. That’s okay too. 
  2. The Church is not perfect, but it’s worth fighting for, and it needs you. Serve it. Love it. Commit to it. 
  3. Keep reading good books. And any way you consume a book counts (yes, that includes listening to it). 
  4. You need exercise, but you don’t have to hate it. Find something that gets you moving that you love, and ignore the idiotic ideas we have about fitness. (No, how long it takes you to run a mile is not the only marker of athleticism.) 
  5. Giving up meat is not that hard. It saves you money, it’s good for the planet, and it lets you find more animals cute without feeling guilty. 
  6. You’re not God. You need to sleep. Channel a bear and try to hibernate at night. 
  7. The Sabbath as a crucial practice didn’t disappear when Jesus came. You need a day where you cease doing and just practice BEING and communing with God. 
  8. You don’t need to be a master chef, but you need to know how to cook a few things. Trust me.
  9. Do the thing that scares YOU. But know how to make yourself feel safe too. Adrenaline in doses is good but you also need security. Give the speech, but buy the weighted blanket and candles. 
  10. Use a budget. It’s just a tool. It isn’t set in stone. Think of it as your money roadmap and reroute it as needed. 
  11. And use your money well. Be generous. Learn how to invest. Financial stewardship is important. 
  12. Relationships of any form don’t just HAPPEN. They need your time and attention. And, if you give your relationships time and attention, proximity is not a factor. But the relationships that last are the ones where both sides are equally committed to the romance/the family/the friendship/the fill-in-the-blank. 
  13. Get out of debt as fast as you can. But buy the freaking coffee. One great drink won’t set you back 50 years. 
  14. Don’t stay in a toxic job. If it’s eroding your boundaries and killing your spirit or causing you to set aside your ethics, it isn’t worth it. You CAN find another one – it isn’t the end of your career, and you don’t have to stay in a bad situation out of some false sense of obligation. 
  15. But don’t quit a job just because it’s hard or someone hurts your feelings. Resilience hurts but grows. Commit unless there is a very good reason to not be committed. 
  16. Travel as much as you can. Even if it’s to a different town in your state. Travel opens our eyes to the lives of others, lets us see beauty, and challenges us. 
  17. If you start drinking coffee, not only will you have caffeine options wherever you go, but you will have a very sweet ritual too. 
  18. Love your family. Commit to your family. Forgive your family. But don’t let genuinely toxic family members ignore your boundaries, and don’t feel like toxic behavior has to be ignored because you are related. Forgiveness erases any debt they owe you, but it doesn’t create an obligation of time spent together. 
  19. Talk to people about your struggles. Vulnerability hurts at first but it takes weight off your shoulders.
  20. You don’t have to live a Pinterest worthy life. Live quietly, live faithfully. It’s enough.
  21. In our society that loves independence, know that God made you dependent. You NEED Scripture. You NEED prayer. You NEED community. 
  22. It is always better to support policy instead of a political party or politician. When was the last time you saw policy wonks screaming at each other in the streets? (If you did see something like that, please send me the video. I would love to witness how a screaming match over Section 230 goes down.) 
  23. You can think a lot of things are good and worth doing or achieving. The government is usually the worst vehicle to get things done. 
  24. It is not always easy, but you should adopt a shelter pet. You’ll see how radically an animal can love and you’ll change a life. 
  25. Tech addictions will kill your spirit. Frequently resist. Delete the apps. Turn off the phone. Outsmart the attention economy. 

And, a +1 to complete the list: 

Salvation through Christ is the only true hope and security you will have in life. The Gospel is that Jesus entered into His creation, lived the life we couldn’t live, died the death we deserve, and conquered death so that one day, only through Him, we will too. It’s THE good news, and I pray you accept it.

And now, a couple of Iceland photos:

Icelandic Horse Investigating Camera
Gullfoss Waterfall
Women Need To Take 'Nice' Off Of Autopilot

Women Need To Take ‘Nice’ Off Of Autopilot

On a recent evening, I was at a coffee shop, headphones on, working on some writing. Suddenly, a man I didn’t know walked right up to my table. 

He was harmless enough. He wanted to joke about the fact that my table was the only one in the entire shop that had the full roster of condiments set out. Hovering awkwardly, he waited for me to laugh along with him, and finally walked away when he realized all he was getting was my blank, mildly irritated stare. 

As women, we have been unconsciously backed into this corner where we’re expected to be ‘nice.’ Unconditionally. Regardless of our feelings. 

And I lived like that for many years. Trying to be nice and laugh along, regardless of the circumstances. It wasn’t until certain situations played out in my life that I recognized the following: 

While I aspire to be a kind and Christlike human, I don’t need to make people feel okay with crossing boundaries or infringing on my personal space by responding in a stereotypically ‘nice’ manner. 

Continuing to use the coffee shop example – was my life in danger? No. But should I be expected to respond well to a strange man entering my personal space and forcing me to stop my work just so he can feel like he cracked a good joke? Absolutely not. 

Let’s use a different example. I live in a home that, before I moved in, had a long roster of tenants. Last summer, I pulled into my driveway to see a car full of strange men sitting there, waiting for someone to get home. 

Did I nicely ask them why they were there? Hell no. I let them know that they were trespassing and that they immediately needed to get off my property – that the people they thought lived there were no longer around and that they were not welcome to wait around or come back. 

Thankfully, they got the hint. 

I’ve told male neighbors with no boundaries that they are not allowed to cross property lines into my backyard as they tried to enter my personal space to talk about something. I’ve lunged out of the way and called out bad first dates who tried to kiss me when it was clear I didn’t want them to do so. I have put space between myself and men in professional settings who decided I should not have a normal personal bubble. 

We have been conditioned to set nice on autopilot. Women – we need to turn it off. I want to be a kind, gentle, and compassionate person. However, I do not want to be a person who compromises my boundaries, my personal space, or my safety just to avoid hurting a man’s feelings. 

Men are not owed ‘nice’ women. ESPECIALLY not when being nice costs us peace of mind or puts us in a dangerous situation. Let’s course correct.

5 COVID-19 Habits I'm Keeping

5 COVID-19 Habits I’m Keeping

COVID-19 made us all adapt huge portions of our lives – including our habits. Some of these habit adaptations were negative (Netflix, we really need to stop meeting each other like this). But some of these new habits were pretty positive.

Here are five habits picked up during COVID-19 that I’m planning on keeping: 

Religiously Sanitizing Gym Equipment

I definitely already used hand sanitizer religiously when at the gym but, gross admission, I was pretty lax when it came to thoroughly sanitizing my gym equipment. Then COVID struck. Fast forward to today, and the idea of touching gym equipment that hasn’t been wiped down grosses me out. 

Normalizing Canceling Plans When Sick

It was incredibly easy to cancel plans during COVID-19 when you felt sick – just add in a, “Sorry, but I want to be cautious, especially right now.” But why do we need that disclaimer to cancel plans or use sick days? You’re sick, germs are real, and healing takes rest – cancel the plans with no remorse. 

Spending Extra Time Making Pets Happy

When you’re away from your pets for a lot of time during the day, you miss many of their habits and what makes them happy. The part of COVID-19 I have LOVED is working from home and getting to see my dogs for much more of the day. I now know exactly how much they like to sleep during the day, what toys they will play with, and the number of times my dachshund wants me to give him scratches (note: it is far more than reasonable). And knowing these things, I WANT to do what makes them happy. They’re a part of my life – I am their entire life, so I want to make it good for them. 

Listening To Your Body When Planning Workouts

Before COVID-19 I would usually push myself through hard workouts, even if my body was telling me not to do it. Now, I can recognize when I need to keep pushing and when I need to adjust. Hard workouts are good – they aren’t good ALL the time. 

Making Things From Scratch

I would bake from time to time before COVID-19, but the number of things I made from scratch during this stretch exploded (at least, by my standards). Normal bread? Sure. But cornbread, frozen Greek yogurt, homemade mug cakes, hot chocolate mix, and more too. Everything tastes better when you make it yourself…and, you know, do it well. 

What are the COVID-19 habits that you want to have stick around?

About to pet my dog without permission? Just don't.

Don’t Pet My Dog

When I take my dog for a walk, I’m really tempted to wear a sign around my neck that says, “Don’t pet him.” 

I would follow this up with a second sign that reads, “Our dogs are not friends – don’t act like they are.” 

But, signs around the neck are a little overboard, so I thought I would explain this to you, my readers. Then, it is your job to tell your friends so that they tell their friends, and the friends tell their friends until the whole world knows not to pet my dog. Or, for that matter, ANY dog. 

One thing COVID-19 put to a halt was being approached by strangers while out on walks. Sometimes it would be somebody who decided to pet my dog without asking permission. Other times, it would be somebody who allowed their dog to run up to mine without permission. But during COVID-19, keeping a six-foot distance prohibited that. 

However, more than a year into the pandemic, fewer people are religiously abiding by the six-foot rule. Thus, the return of my frustration. 

You should never, NEVER go pet a dog without talking to its owner. And you ESPECIALLY should not let your dog approach it without seeking the same permission. 

I’m going to use my dog as a classic example of why forgoing permission is a problem. I rescued him when he was picked up off the streets, and while I don’t know his background, I do know his triggers. He hates being approached suddenly, dislikes tall men, and gets really aggressive with big dogs. All probably for a reason, but for a reason unknown to me. 

Aside from just being rude, people and dogs who approach my dog without asking could cause someone to get hurt. My dog doesn’t have teeth (again, no idea why!) but still has the ability to clamp onto a person or a dog pretty painfully. And, if he does that to a dog that responds aggressively in turn, my little dog could get really hurt.

Some people may be okay with you and your dog visiting with their dog – that’s great. I’m not one of them. Either way, here is your public service announcement for the day: Always, ALWAYS, ask permission for you (or your dog) to approach another dog.*

*Obvious exception being dog parks. Go crazy there.

Here are five pointers to help you plan the best (BUDGET FRIENDLY) trip yet:

Kelvey’s Five Point Trip Planning Guide

Here’s something very few people know about me: I LOVE planning trips. Love it. I love finding great deals, getting hyped to go to new places, and, above all, I love planning the trip agenda. 

So, as someone who would totally plan other people’s trips for them just to do it, here are my five pointers for planning a great trip: 

Establish Parameters Based On Who You’re Traveling With

Who is traveling with you? Your family? Your friends? A lot of people? One other person? Traveling by yourself?

Nailing this down makes all the difference. One thing it impacts is the location – I typically save super outdoorsy trips for when I’m traveling solo and try to emphasize more local, cultural, and food options when I have a group. It also impacts budget – you may be able to buy a ticket to Europe right now, but if you’re traveling with a group, you need to know what they can afford. 

Set A Budget

Set. A. Budget. Do not spend on a whim – you WILL spend way too much. But at the same time, don’t set your spending limit too low, because that’s the fastest way to guarantee failure. When I plan for trips, I usually have a housing budget and a travel budget.

I also have a spending budget that includes a realistic amount for every meal I will eat, coffee money, the money for all the planned events, and some flexible spending money. For example, on my recent trip to New Orleans, the flexible spending was put toward artwork for my home and local chicory coffee. I would have bought these things with or without the budget because I loved them so much, but having them in-budget protected the rest of my finances.

Do NOT Only Look At One Option

If you’re rolling with the first option you see, you’re not getting a good deal. Compare airlines, or, if you’re loyal to a single airline for the points (like me!), compare flights. Is it less expensive to take a super late flight out a night early versus a morning flight the next day? Do the same with housing and car rentals. I’m constantly flipping through hotel versus Airbnb prices and if I can’t take public transportation like the Metro, comparing car rental companies to things like Turo.

Read All Sorts of Reviews

I literally planned a trip last night, and you know what I had pulled up? Yelp, Google reviews, Reddit, and all sorts of local review blogs. Getting perspective and hearing what other people (ESPECIALLY locals) think will help you prioritize where you should go. While not always foolproof (some NOLA reviews ended up letting me DOWN), this process has proved useful 90 percent of the time. 

Block All Your Time In A Trip Doc, But Leave Wiggle Room

Finally, the part I love most – pulling together a trip document! When I travel, EVERYTHING goes into one document. This can either be accessed on your phone or, if you’re worried about a lack of service or your phone dying, can be printed out. I always go the phone route because that makes life easier, both for navigation and for updates on the fly. 

All my research gets pulled together in this document, along with all addresses (because just having to go one place for your phone GPS serves wonders) and any tips or notes I may have. Since I apparently lost the last couple of trip docs and am not about to share the one from my upcoming trip with the public (sorry folks!), here is an example of a morning in one of my trip plans: 

NEW ORLEANS

MONDAY

8 am: Get ready, walk over to the coffee shop for breakfast. 

9 am: Head out for swamp tour (address here)

9:30 am: Arrive at swamp tour. (Parking for free around the corner, check-in at the gift shop)

11 am: Wrap up swamp tour, head to French Market (address here)

11:30 am: Arrive at French Market, shop

12:45 pm: Grab coffee + beignets at Cafe Du Monde (leave car where it’s parked – it’s walkable)

The trick to this? ALWAYS leave wiggle room. For trips I’m taking solo, I just leave enough wiggle room for if travel time or a planned item takes longer because I get to plan exactly how I want. When you’re traveling with a group, everything that can go wrong will go wrong. Leave a LOT of flexibility for if you’re running late, if the mood of the group doesn’t match the mood of the plans, etc. 

Happy travels!